19 Aug How To Be Exceptional

Let me start with this simple premise: Most people aren’t exceptional. If the opposite were the case, it would render the word ‘exceptional’ meaningless.  If everyone were exceptional, then no one would be exceptional. 

Premise #2: More people think they are exceptional than truly are. Everyone wants to think they are unique. People love to believe they are different from most other people. We all have unique characteristics about ourselves, but even in this sense we are uniform. 

What then does it take to become truly exceptional?

To me, this question introduces the broader question of what does it take to become anything?

Becoming is a formation. Formation is a process. Process is fueled by practice and patience. Practice is showing up – with or without intention – to direct decisions into habit. These habits become the fabric of our character. The external world interacts with our internally-constituted tapestry of habits.

So if most people aren’t exceptional, and “becoming” ultimately comes down to what we practice, then it follows that becoming exceptional is about practicing the things that most people don’t. 

There is a certain amount of swimming upstream required here. Intentionality is indispensable.  Mindfulness is a must. 

More important than either of these is a keen understanding of purpose. Without this understanding it will be virtually impossible to gain the focus needed to sustain practice to the point of formation.

Why do you want to be exceptional? I assume that you do or else why would you be reading this? The true answer to this question is your purpose. Fair warning: the “true” answer may not be as surface level as it seems. It may take some digging to access the root-level reason that you desire to stand out from the rest. 

Not all purposes possess equal value. 

If you want to be exceptional as a means to validate your personal worth, then you are climbing a hill upon which many people better than both of us have already died. History is littered with casualties of this expedition. Let me save you the heartache: work on your understanding of your personal worth in other ways and pick a new purpose. 

If you want to be exceptional because you already realize your infinite and inexorable personal worth and are dissatisfied with the status quo, then I believe you are in the game for the right reasons.

What’s next? Quite simply, use your gift of awareness to tie the popular practices to the outcomes that you do not like. Then, pick better practices.

Most people overeat and are overweight. If you want to be exceptional here, find exercise modalities that resonate with you and are proven to be effective. Educate yourself about nutrition and practice the discipline of mindful eating.

Most people get to a certain point in their career and/or craft and then plateau. Exceptionality here requires continual investment in learning and striving to add increasing value to what you do. Read something by someone who knows something you don’t. Interact with people who know more than you and have achieved the things you want to accomplish. 

None of this is novel. It’s always funny to me that exceptional people rarely do anything that is beyond our understanding. The thing is that exceptional people don’t stop at understanding. They actually do something. 

I’ll leave you with this question pair: In what area are you most inspired to be exceptional? What one relationship would benefit most from this choice to be exceptional?